In the village and Burundi reflections

Today's adventure was to go to a local village about 30 minutes away to provide them with some clothes and school supplies that had been donated by people over the past few months. We set up inside their church, which is fairly new, only about two years old. I'd say the dimensions of the church were about 10-12 feet wide and 25-30 feet in length with a dirt floor, three small benches, and an unsteady altar. When we arrived, they were having a celebration outside singing and dancing to Christian music (which is pretty much the only type of music that we have heard since being here with the exception of the gym in the hotel and the Neil Diamond cd being played while having dinner with the General). We were welcomed by the pastor, organized the gifts for the villagers, and then joined the celebrations to introduce ourselves. After the introductions, the military personnel that had come with us distributed what there was inside the church, thankfully with only a few small and controllable riots breaking out, primarily among the children who all wanted pencils.

I chose to stay outside and observe, especially considering how small the church was and how incredibly warm it gets inside. So, I ended up amusing myself with some of the children, learning the hard way that a great way to start a small child riot is to put one or two of them on your lap. It's also a great way to get a crowd of children around you. In the end, three children really latched on to me and had to be told that I was leaving and they had to let go - and then one of those still wouldn't admit to herself that it was true and continued to follow me out towards the car until COL Isaac said something to her, I think towards the effect of, "they are about to serve lunch, don't you want to go eat?", to which she quickly scurried off. They were all quite adorable, but lesson learned.

The inside of the village church

I just loved this picture. I also love the tree protector for the infant tree.

My new best friend

My two other best friends

This is what happens when you show the children what the reverse photo function does on the iPhone and that they can watch themselves. Shortly after this was taken, I gave my phone to Brad since he had pockets and I wasn't sure I'd get it back otherwise...

Shortly before the child "riot" broke out for my attention, lap, and potential "mizungu power" to get them extra supplies (so they thought)

As I wrap up this trip to Bujumbura, Burundi, I am trying to process everything that I have experienced in the past 7 days. I don't know if I fully can, or if I'm even meant to right now, but I definitely do have some thoughts.

- Do I feel good about myself because I have helped people of an incredibly impoverished area?

In a word, no. That doesn't mean that I feel bad for having come out here. Just the opposite, in fact. However, I don't know if I really made much of a difference. In short bursts, yes, I have helped to put smiles on the faces of men, women, and children who may not have had a reason to smile that day and that's something to be proud of. But, I don't feel like I have made any sort of significant impact, at least not yet. I know that my skill set is incredibly desired, and my hope is that I will be able to return and continue in the project of helping the soldiers strengthen and expand their adaptive sports program and maybe, over time and in ways that I can't think of right now, I will be able to help in more of a physical rehabilitative function. No big problem is changed over night, and this area of the world captivates that sentiment. 

Yet, I can't help but to also feel a bit like the stereotypical white man coming to help those of lesser means because I can and they need it. There is an air of superiority to that sentiment, of course, but that's because there is a part of me that feels like that's what happened, even if unintentionally. However, I will say that the group that I am here with is adamant about trying to not be "those people" by just handing out money and supplies, patting ourselves on the back for a job well done, and then returning home. The reason that they have come down so many times (Brian, Brad, and Duncan have all been here at least five times a piece) is to put into place plans and actions that will help the community that we are serving while also requiring that they do some work for maintenance. They are firm believers, as am I, that accountability and oversight is key to allowing the soldiers that we are working with to learn how to function on their own when we aren't here, and we have been able to meet with some wonderful people that can hopefully help to put those intentions into action.

So, after one trip, I feel like my impact is minimal, but I believe that there is the potential for amazing things to be done over a long period of time.

- Did I solve my anger issues that I talked about realizing before coming here?

No, but I definitely did not get angry this week. In fact, I was quite relaxed once I got over the newness of the environment. I also had a chance to do a lot of reflecting on where that anger is coming from, and  I'm pretty sure that a lot of it has to do with my lack of self-confidence and intense disappointment in myself at not being perfect. Being that I live and put myself into such high-stress and Type A environments, I am essentially setting myself up for failure, and I have realized that I need to start taking a step back and see how some of those situations can be mitigated. I have some ideas, but they will take some time to unfold. It was also helpful to be in this environment and feel so loved by so many people, regardless of how well I did something or if I fall short of their expectations (mainly because they have no expectations of me at this point).

- Did I strengthen my relationship with God?

Yes, I did. I'm still no Bible-thumper or theologian, but because of the people that I was with, the discussions that I had, and the experiences that I was exposed to, I was able to see God's providing hand in ways that I otherwise may have taken for granted. My faith was challenged and questioned, and I opened my heart to others' points of view only to come out stronger in many ways in the end. 

- Did I drink the water?

No, but I still got sick. Miserably, miserably sick. 

- Did I get to experience some of Burundi culture?

Of course, how could I not? However, it was through plexiglass with a few cracks in it (hopefully that analogy makes sense...it was the first thing to come to mind). Perspective: I am typing this blog from the balcony of my hotel with fairly consistent wifi connection, electricity with only one or two quick power outages per night, and water that generally runs, although sometimes not during the day or not hot. I got my hands dirty, ate some local food, went to a dowry party and a"petting" zoo, and saw where and how people live in the capital and outside villages. But, it was all temporary and I knew that I was going to have food at my next meal if I wanted it, a steady supply of potable water, and a shower at the end of the day before I went to bed in an air conditioned room.

- Did I catch malaria?

I won't know for a while yet, but anything is possible - I'll find out once the incubation period is over. I did find out that mosquitos do have a preference in who they bite, and it was confirmed that I am one of their preferences. I lost full count, but as of a couple days ago, it was above 50. And yes, I diligently used bug spray.

- Would I come back to Burundi?

In a heartbeat. I hope that God will provide a way for me to come back multiple times over the coming years to continue to help with the projects that are being set up. But that's all to unfold as the tick tocks on. 

We fly out tomorrow afternoon, so this will be my last entry for this trip. Thanks to all who supported me before and while I have been here and shared my adventures vicariously through this blog. May God bless you all. Amahoro (Peace).